Category Archives: New Book Release

The Nerd in search of a Dinner Date

Beneath that pocket protector beats a sincere heart!

Seeking a date for Valentine’s Day?  Jane Austen’s Sir Walter Elliot points you in an unlikely direction.

Enjoy this excerpt from Sir Walter’s new advice e-book, Marrying Well for Fun & Profit:

OOO

Sir Walter is over the moon. He finally has a book all to himself.

Soon to be a bestseller, of course… according to Sir Walter

My Dear Vulgarian Miss,

As winter begins to flee, a particular sort of male emerges from hibernation. I refer to the Nerd in search of a Valentine’s dinner date.

As a modern woman you are familiar with the type. Highly intelligent, the Nerd spends countless hours at a desk, often with nothing but a computer, a caffeinated beverage, and the light from his desk lamp to keep him warm.

You laugh at him behind your hand, for he is a witless wonder when it comes to courtship. Alas, the gentleman’s art of sophisticated flirtation is beyond him.

Image: Betsy Weber (Creative Commons Flickr)

Image: Betsy Weber (Creative Commons Flickr)

But my dear, consider carefully before you disregard him as a suitor. For while ‘nerd’ is certainly a four-letter word, it is usually accompanied by a six-figure income.

Think Bill Gates, but on a smaller scale.

In social situations the poor fellow will be tongue-tied by your beauty, so it is best to prepare for a conversational disaster. No doubt he will be fortified with compliments, calculated to charm and beguile. Do your best not to laugh when he employs one of these timeworn pick-up lines…

I less than three you. 'nuff said. <3 Image: John Nakamura Remy (Creative Commons Flickr)

“I less than three you.”  ❤
Image: John Nakamura Remy (Creative Commons Flickr)

  • ‘Your name is Leslie? Look, I can spell your name on my calculator!’
  • ‘Roses are #FF0000, violets are #0000FF…’
  • ‘I wish I was an ion so I could form an exothermic bond with you.’
  • ‘You must be an asymptote; I just find myself getting closer and closer to you.’
  • ‘Forget hydrogen, you’re my number one element!’
  • ‘My sudden, protracted cardiac arrhythmia tells me I love you.
  • ‘Are you the square root of 2? Because I feel irrational when I’m around you.’
  • ‘If you were a graphics calculator, I’d look at your curves all day long!’
  • ‘Why don’t you join me on World of Warcraft tomorrow? I’ll even give you my avatar’s name.’
Image: Betsy Weber (Creative Commons Flickr)

Image: Betsy Weber (Creative Commons Flickr)

Remember, my dear, that a sincere heart beats beneath that pocket protector. And that six-figure income on the tax return is easy on the eyes, even if he is not.

Cordially yours in the upward climb,

Sir Walter Elliot

 

NASA scientists have discovered a new form of life.
Unfortunately, it won’t date them either.
STEPHEN COLBERT

OOO

Want more of Sir Walter’s wit and wisdom?
Such a deal at 99 cents!
Marrying Well for Fun & Profit at Amazon

Laura Hile (1)

New Release: Marrying Well for Fun & Profit

Sir Walter is over the moon. He finally has a book all to himself.

Soon to be a bestseller, of course

At last, after years of being misunderstood and maligned I, Sir Walter Elliot, finally have the spotlight. That is to say, my very own advice e-book.

And you need advice, dear reader, if you are to move up the social ladder. Do you wish to remain ordinary? Of course not! But marrying well — and improving your family’s gene pool in the process — is not as easy as it appears.

Why fade into the social landscape, like my daughter Anne? Wouldn’t you rather make an impression? Wouldn’t you rather attract a handsome man, who is also a man of means and good breeding?

I will show you how. My e-book is bursting with wise and witty nuggets. It’s just the thing to accompany your morning cup of coffee or tea.

A hit of caffeine and a dose of social sagacity. What could be better?

All this could be yours, if you know the way.

All this could be yours, if you know the way.

Youth and beauty are fleeting, my dear.  Allow me to help you to make the most of them.

Here is the purchase link to Amazon. In my humble opinion, the decimal place should be nudged over several places. But Laura Hile assures me that I could make up the difference in sales volume. Well, of course!

As always, I remain,

Cordially yours in the upward climb,

Sir Walter Elliot

Laura Hile (1)

A Happy Vote? This time, yes.

Photo: Ze've Barkan (Creative Commons Flickr)

Photo: Ze’ve Barkan (Creative Commons Flickr)

For there are two really wonderful choices. How’s that for great?

Our own Robin Helm is about to release a new novel, and she’d like your help deciding.

She has two beautiful covers for her book Understanding Elizabeth. Which one do you like best?

jj1813-logoCome over to Just Jane 1813 and cast your vote. I won’t steal Claudine’s thunder by posting the images here. Nor will I tell you about the “cover girl” who is Robin’s Elizabeth Bennet. So exciting!

What are you waiting for? Click the link and vote!

Darcy hops into the Kindle Unlimited pool

Now in Kindle Unlimited

Kindle Unlimited is a win-win for authors and readers.

Darcy By Any Other Name celebrates its three-month anniversary soon, so I decided to enroll it in Kindle Unlimited. Such a deal for the borrowing reader! All the Kindle e-books one’s heart could desire for just $9.99 per month.

It’s been three days, and I’m blown away by the response. Just this morning, almost 5,000 pages have been read. I’m excited to see Kindle Unlimited introduce Darcy to a wider reading audience. What’s not to love about a fun body swap?

The blue line goes up and up.

Kindle Unlimited readers are loving Darcy. That pages-read line is a- climbing today. And it’s only 11:00 a.m.

And check this out: Austenesque Reviews is giving away a Darcy e-book this week. It’s easy to enter. Follow this link, enjoy Meredith’s review, and leave a comment.

There are more Darcy giveaways scheduled, so stay tuned. Next up, Janet Taylor’s More Agreeably Engaged blog.  I’m loving the chance to meet so many new readers.

Did I mention that Darcy By Any Other Name is ON SALE?  Another reason to celebrate. Through August 10th, the Kindle edition is $3.99.

Read Meredith's review. Enter the giveaway

Read Meredith’s review. Enter the giveaway. Or if you can’t wait to get started, take advantage of the sale.

And that’s not all. Look for the Mercy’s Embrace trilogy to get new covers–and a new, swoon-worthy ending too. Hooray! I’m gunning for an October re-release celebration, just in time for rainy day reading. Tell you what, I’ve got my work cut out for the rest of the summer.

Exciting times, absorbing reading. That’s the latest book news from me.

 

Laura Hile (1)

Darcy By Any Other Name GIVEAWAY

“Pride and Prejudice Meets Freaky Friday.” This headline–thank you, Chautona Havig!— tells you quite a bit about my new release, a fun body swap romance.

The Pride & Prejudice body swap romance that has everyone talking

The Pride & Prejudice body swap romance that has readers talking. Yes, that’s Mr. Collins on the cover.

And the buzz about Darcy By Any Other Name is spreading. It’s not because of advertisements–my budget for that is almost nil. No, people are hearing about this book because of YOU, my generous social media friends.  I am so very grateful for your likes and tweets and shares.

I’ve always said that I write for the thinking reader, but my goodness. Those articulate reviews at Amazon! Who knew that so many people share my subtle and quirky sense of humor? And believe, along with me, that true love also involves a meeting of the minds?

So now it’s time to give back–with a GIVEAWAY. I am offering one Darcy By Any Other Name ebook to two (2) lucky winners.

Entering is easy. Simply comment to this post by midnight, June 13, 2016.

It kind of has to be the 13th because of the book’s release date. Yeah, Friday, May 13, 2016. Otherwise known as “Freaky Friday.” I’m still smiling about that.

The print edition "selfie" ... all 662 pages.

Print edition “selfie,” 662 pages

If you’d like to check out the first five chapters (via Look Inside), here is the link to Amazon.  Speaking of Amazon…

The print edition of Darcy went live last night. Lo and behold, most of  the features are linked up and running.  It’s in Amazon’s match program, meaning that when you purchase the print book, you get the Kindle edition free.

About the price? Yeah, that. This is a BIG book, so think of it like a collector’s edition. Useful for readerly escape from the stress of workaday life … and also for clonking burglars!

Laura Hile (1)

A book’s success is like surfing

Photo: Miguel Navaza (Creative Commons Flickr)

Years of practice (and failure) built this surfer’s graceful skill. Photo: Miguel Navaza (Creative Commons Flickr)

I’ve released a new book, and the process kind of reminds me of surfing. Okay, body surfing. I was never brave enough–or coordinated enough!–to try it with a board. Tanning on the beach? Forget that. Why lie in the sun when you can spend the afternoon catching waves? Many summer days at Santa Monica and Malibu taught me a thing or two.

Surfing is about position, skill, and timing. This means hours in the water, being ready, watching wave after wave. Learning how to know a promising wave from a dud. Being willing to swim like crazy to catch the awesome one. You can’t be lazy as a surfer.

Position would be the intriguing story premise and the cover. These are what put me in the water, and each one represents a risk. I wasn’t sure how the ‘magical reality’ element of the body swap would fly. And that sweet cover was spendy–but worth every cent.

Skill? I’ve been writing for 17 years. If Darcy By Any Other Name is an instant success, know that I’ve been rolled under by plenty of waves. (Yeah, the wipeout thing.) I’ve learned to escape the worst by diving under, but multiple thousands of clunky words lie at my back. Then too, I teach fiction writing to high school students. What I’ve learned in helping them improve is a lot.

And timing is about being in the right place at the right moment. There are more Austen readers now than ever before. No readers, no wave!

Photo: Swell Surf Camp (Creative Commons Flickr)

Photo: Swell Surf Camp (Creative Commons Flickr)

Surfing, like writing, only appears solitary. The photo at the top of this page shows a lone surfer, but I’m betting he wasn’t the only one in the water that day. Bobbing heads beyond the line of surf are not attractive, so they’re cropped out. Deal is, no one surfs alone. No one writes a book alone–or should.

The fellowship of like minds is crucial. As with surfing, skills are developed alone but there is safety in companionship. In the water and out, surfers hang together and talk. If writing greats C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien needed a support group, so do I.

Darcy By Any Other Name

Darcy By Any Other Name

Sales numbers continue to roll in, and not because of me. News about Darcy is being spread by people like you, my social media friends. A hectic school schedule has allowed me little time to compose ads or tweet or anything. I’ve put up a few posts on Facebook, and you have been sharing them.  I am beyond grateful.

You know you want this book, right? So enter to win it! There’s a giveaway going on right now at Just Jane 1813. It’s easy, simply post a reply by May 29, 2016.

Laura Hile (1)

They won’t say it but I will

As you saw on the previous post, Laura Hile’s Darcy By Any Other Name is now available in the Kindle version right now. Go and buy it. When the paperback version is available, go buy that as well. I have no idea what the price of the print version will be, but I’ll bet, even when added to the $4.99 for the Kindle version, you will be down less than what you’d spend on a movie and lunch. (HInt, Jane Austen’s Lady Susan, directed by Whit Stillman, is said to be a worthy offering.)

Below is a photograph of a woman working in an airplane factory in WWII.

LH_aircraft_worker

QA. Quality Control. That what writers do just before the hit “SEND.” A writer has the idea. We draw up the the blueprints, or plot. The parts, or characters are molded by us, and we assemble the lot of it to make a novel. And most of that is done alone. Except for the coffee/liquor/chocolate that many of us use to medicate our way through the manufacturing process.

In the same way that we salute the civilian women of WWII, salute your favorite writers by buying their books. A nice payday is a great reward for a story well-done. Review their books. Nothing says “I care” like helping other readers understand the greatness of your fave author. And most of all, enjoy their work. Writers may never see their readers, but we do get a kick out of knowing someone is going to get that sly little joke in Chapter 10.

Again, DARCY BY ANY OTHER NAME is available at Amazon. Buy it. You will not regret it.