Hide your children!
I received quite a shock last night, and I still ain’t over it.
I’d just returned home from helping to lead a Children’s Choir Christmas program followed by orchestra practice for our cantata at church.
My mind was filled with lovely, happy thoughts about Hallmark movies and puppies.
I stretched out on the couch in front of the TV, booted up my laptop, went to Amazon, and there it was! I covered up my eyes, but it was just too late.
I’d already been incensed – flashed right in front of my husband and everybody! That man on my screen wasn’t wearing nothin’ but a smile!
After fighting off one 99 cent nekkid guy about three weeks ago for best seller status, I saw a 99 cent nekkid SANTA had knocked A Very Austen Christmas down to second place.
And he’s headless! He’s a nekkid torso Santa! That’s just too scary for me. I’m near about sure he leads straight to a permanent place on the naughty list.
I’m gonna board up my chimney, lock my doors, and stay out of the malls. I don’t think nobody needs to see a nekkid, headless, torso Santa.